Tag Archives: problems

Day 3 ! Early Rise & Grind

44c7b99f-a3da-41dd-8721-5bd3dbc9e286wallpaperHelllooo everyone, today was an EARLY day. I’m currently at work just waiting for the next transport. I was up around 4:30AM, got to work 5:15AM and now it’s 8:20AM lol… BORING, but hey… we gotta do, what we gotta doooo!

photo-3Well, after our first transport I ordered an Ice Coffee with Cream & Sugar (yikes!). I was too afraid to go black because I wasn’t sure if i’d like it or not. I like hot black coffee though. Eh whatever, I can’t wait for breakfast though, i’m starving! I’m thinking egg whites with tomato, lettuce and mozzarella on multigrain toast. ahhh excited!

So today is, I believe Cardio & Resistance training for INSANITY. I’m going straight to doing that afterwork. Woop woop! Then I’m feeling sushi later with my sister and her boyfriend. Ah man, can NEVER go wrong with sushi… and then dinner is just gonna be a protein shake.

proteinThis is what I have, it’s actually pretty tasty. If I use it as a meal replacement like I will today, than I add 8oz of low fat milk and 1 scoop of protein powder, if it’s a snack/post-workout drink then I just use water with 2 scoops of protein powder. And my favorite bottle ever! The Blender Bottle! Best investment ever! :]

Well, I really have nothing else to talk about… Today is just an early day. Oh, but I do have a healthy recipe to share! I think I’m going to make a batch tonight to eat tomorrow and friday for lunch :] Try it out!
Quinoa Turkey With Feta and Sundried Tomatoes
Cook quinoa as per packet instructions. Make turkey burgers with turkey minced, diced onions and garlic, freshly chopped parsley and coriander, cumin, salt and pepper. Drizzle the olive oil from marinated feta and olive jars over the quinoa and break up the turkey burgers, combining them with the quinoa. Add lemon juice and combine sundried tomatoes and olives.

*I got this off instagram, i follow healthy eats or something like that. It sounds good, but we’ll see.

Have a great day everyone! and if you got awesome recipes, PLEASE PLEASE SHARE



Day 2! Plyometric cardio & yummy Chipotle dindin

ImageSo to the left would be pre-work out and to the right would be post-workout lol… Man, I was DRIPPING IN SWEAT.

So last night I had the overnight Ambulance shift and had NO SLEEEEP 😦 It was terrible. I got home around 730am and passed out. I officially got off my bed at 4pm. I wasted my whole day!! AHHH, but it’s alright… Got up, got my work out clothes on and did INSANITY!

I burned 460 calories ! I thought it would be more with how hard I worked but oh well.

After that I was hungry so I ran to Chipotle, was really craving it.  I got the bowl, brown rice, black beans, tomatoes, lettuce and some cheese.. or and (don’t judge) sour cream.. haha, its so good!!! lol and then I had sparkling blackberry juice.

Photo on 5-21-13 at 6.04 PMI couldn’t even finish that massive bowl, but it was so good and the drink was too. Now if i was following my 8 hour feast schedule like normal, I wouldn’t have gotten all that… would be like a small taco but since it’s already past 6pm and i’m not supposed to be eating anymore, I went a little more than usual on my meal. I’m satisfied =] and it worth totally worth it, haha.

Well, that was pretty much my boring, boring day. Sleep, work out, eat and now i’m just gonna chill and watch TV in my room. I have to up at 4:15 AM tomorrow for work 😦 ugh… So early bedtime for me! Hope you all had a great day ;]


It’s been since March 1st, that I’ve written a post… I’m SORRY!.. I will say I fell off the wagon.. AGAIN. But it wasn’t all a fail.. I was keeping active and eating healthy. I started INSANITY and then after a month fell off because life happened and emotionally I was destroyed. Last week was the WORST week of my life.. Monday, I didn’t pass my last nursing exam which meant I couldn’t move forward in the program. I have to wait til NEXT SPRING. Which I cried my eyes out when I found out, Tuesday was a family problem that left me crying a lot also, Wednesday, my boyfriend who I fell in love with, so damn hard for… turned out to still be in love with his ex-girlfriend and so left me… do I even need to tell you how I felt? Then Friday I was let go from my job because they didn’t need me anymore due to lack of clientele… SOOOOOOOOOO that was just terrible. i skipped Insanity for the week, didn’t sleep, didn’t eat….been an emotional wreck but TODAY I woke up fantastical :] I have an interview this week for a full time job ;], I’m getting back to my goal as a fitness model, I feel fantastic. So here is to new goals, FITNESS, HEALTHY, HAPPY & KILLER CONFIDENCE. I hope my followers are still out there and you continue to support me. I’m back ;]

progressss ;]

progressss ;]

Dayy 17- success ! + a cookie

Soooo first and foremost !
I got a 92 on my final today *bowing* thank you thank you lol

Breakfast was a Granny Smith apple and tea– wasn’t hungry but I knew I had to eat something.

Lunch was beans and whole wheat tortillas again, was craving it lol

I was craving sweets sooo bad so I had mango !! And I think black berries with whip cream (only a little whip cream)

Dinner was at work today, the mom made pork, mash potatoes and salad so that was my dinner. Good shit, I think I ate too much of though.

Portion control ! Fuuuuck you lol

I went for a short jog today, about 30 minutes. Was nice, nice stress reliever with music pumping in the ears.

Oh yeah, I had a candy cane too– classmate of mine gave us a penlight with a candy cane for Christmas. Couldn’t resist !

Isn’t it so cute !! Lol

I know… Slap on the wrist.

And now I’m jut watching television With the kiddies. And I ate a damn cookie with milk…

real big whip to the wrist lol

but you know what? It’s okay, I exercised, I ate healthy for 90% of my day. That’s it for the rest of night… No more food ! Haha
Just tea– did I mention I love tea??

I’m proud of today, I feel a difference with these simple changes I’m making, and I’m understanding what foods make me feel bloated and not. Eating this one cookie gave me a real belly ache believe it or not ! Mango earlier hit the sweet spot.

I just have to constantly remind myself before I put food in my mouth is will this make me feel good? Or bad?

Simple changes everyday. I know one of these days I’ll have it down pat ;]

Night kiddies !

talking to myself: preparing the start

It’s Friday, November 30th, 2012. 10:38pm… I just weighed myself… and it says 180.5 pounds. That is the heaviest I have ever weighed. I burst into tears earlier today, because I couldn’t get my largest pair of jeans to fit me. I felt embarrassed with myself, ashamed. How could I let myself get this way? I used to say when I was younger that I will never allow myself to get fat. Everyone says I look amazing, but I feel disgusting. I’m fortunate that my body spreads the fat out into an hour glass formation, that way I don’t look like a giant watermelon waddling around. My thighs and butt are ugly with cellulite, my arms are are large and I can’t even fit into the sleeves of my shirt. All I have been wearing lately are my sweat pants, baggy shirts. I’m so ashamed, I’ve eaten Mc Donald’s almost everyday, hiding from everyone so they didn’t see. I have been eating like 10 meals a day of pure shit.  I don’t understand how i’ve been able to recognize what I’m doing wrong and continue to bite into the food, cursing at myself. The taste of food is such a comfort, but the feeling it leaves in my stomach is a cruel one, that mocks my weakness, and pushes me to do it again. 

I am struggling, binging, crying and I want to stop. 

That’s why I’m going to publicly document my journey. EVERYTHING. I want others who struggle with food and weight to have some kind of inspiration, or simply someone to relate to. 
I want to see my daily achievements, what changes I can make, and hopefully if this blog hits off, advice and support of readers. 

Every person has the right to be happy with themselves. I have a lot going for me. I am nursing student, EMT, I’m a hard worker and have a wonderful group of friends and support system, but I have no self esteem and it all has to do with my obsession and addiction to food, and how unhappy I am at my body and what I see. Maybe not everyone cares about the physical aspect, but I do and so do thousands of others. Even though I’ve taken this step a hundred times before, I’m going to take this step along with everyone else.

Wish me luck. tomorrow is day 1. Image